March 18-24

Today's weight: 174.4 pounds.

Workouts:
Monday: Stairs for 40 minutes, abs
Tuesday: Ran 5K in 30:37
Wednesday: Off
Thursday: Sprints for 2 miles (up to 8 mph)
Friday: Off
Saturday: Elliptical for 1 hour (5 miles)
Sunday: Off

I hurt myself. Again. This happened at the exact same time last year -- I was even training for the same 10K I'm training for now. I know I've said running is a lesson in patience, but I'm still feeling particularly defeated. In my down moments, I tell myself I wasn't meant to run. That I'll never truly be a "runner." That I get hurt too much, that I'm just not strong enough. But I know that's not true. All the times I've dragged myself out of bed in the dark, made myself run that extra 5 minutes, forced myself out of the house in the cold -- that's what makes me a runner.

But it's still frustrating. I have a stress fracture in my leg, most likely for shin splints I stupidly ignored. I haven't hurt this much since I first started running, nearly two years ago. I read that you get shin splints/stress fractures when you're first starting running and/or when you up the intensity of your runs abruptly. I've been pushing speed a lot lately -- maybe not gradually enough.

So, I'm adjusting my training plan and trying to make the most of it. At least it will push me to do more weight-training. And until my leg feels better, I'm taking my workouts one week at a time, and trying not to worry too much about that 10K. 

March 4-10

Today's weight: 174.6 pounds

Workouts:
Monday: Ran 5K, abs and back
Tuesday: Elliptical for 5K
Wednesday: Upper body/abs for 30 minutes
Thursday: Off
Friday: Off
Saturday: Ran 5K
Sunday: Ran 5K

This was a week of firsts. The first time I fit in five workouts since the new year (or longer). The first time I ran outside since October. The first time I signed up for a 10K (though I'd started training for one before, but got hurt before I could even sign up).

Running outside was exactly what I needed. I haven't been to the gym since Tuesday. Even in the dreary, cold mist, it felt good. I needed some fresh air. I've felt cooped up. This helped.

I made myself a 10K training guide, adapted from this. Tonight will be the first workout. It's ten weeks long, and it has three days of running, three days of strength-training, and two days of cross-training each week. I'm hoping this is what it will take to do the things I want to do but haven't made myself do (run more than 5 miles, lift weights, etc.). I used a training guide to run my first 5K. I don't know why I didn't think of this a long time ago.

While making the 10K plan, I realized the other day that running has been a lesson in patience. I am not a patient person, ever. But running -- something I've been working at for two years -- has taught me how to persist, how to practice, how to be deliberate. Nothing else has (except, maybe, for grad school). I've spent two years trying to whittle down my mile time, two years trying to build endurance. I'm excited for what this third year holds.

February 25-March 3

Today's weight: 175.5 pounds

Workouts:
Monday: Ran 5K, abs
Tuesday: 3.5 miles of running/hill mix
Wednesday: Off
Thursday: Spin for 50 minutes, abs and back
Friday: Off
Saturday: Hiked/jogged 30 minutes in the snow
Sunday: Hiked 1 hour in the snow

I spent the weekend in a cabin not too far from here, relaxing and hiking with my boyfriend. It was a short trip, but exactly what I needed. I feel rested. The only thing I missed was getting in one longer workout, but the weekend was well worth it. It felt so good to get outside in the sunshine and crisp air. I've been cooped up indoors for too long.

I'm happy to have kept up the varied workouts. This week I actually did weight-training for two days -- which is more than I've done in a long, long time. Pretty sad, but it's a start. I also started a little paper journal for workouts/food/health, just to track my progress on a more detailed level. I've been eating a little healthier. Not eating out as much. I'm feeling good. I still have shin splints, though. I'm buying new shoes next weeks, and a friend of mine sent me an article on proper running technique. Between those two things, I'm hoping to feel better soon.

February 18-24

Today's weight: 178.0 pounds.

Workouts:
Monday: Off
Tuesday: Ran 5K in 31 minutes
Wednesday: Stair climb for 30 minutes
Thursday: Spin for 50 minutes, abs
Friday: Ran 2 miles, elliptical 3 miles
Saturday and Sunday: Off

I've been trying to vary my workouts more, now that I know I can run the distances I want to run. And, look! I finally did weight-training. A very little bit of it, but it's a start. I've had bad shin splints for the first time in about a year -- I'm not sure if it's because I'm running more, or faster, or just that my shoes are worn out.  I'm hoping mixing up my workouts will help. Otherwise, it's time to buy shoes. Again. Already.

February 11-17

Today's weight: 173.8.

Workouts:
Monday: Stair climbed for 30 minutes, walked for 1 mile
Tuesday: Ran 3.1 miles
Wednesday: Off
Thursday: Off
Friday: Ran 3.1 miles
Saturday: Ran 4.5 miles
Sunday: Off

I like getting longer runs (if you count 4.5 miles as a "long" run) in on the weekends. I don't feel as rushed, and I have more time to recover. I want to run a 10K in April, and I'm on track so far. Also registering for a 5K in April. I'm hoping to beat my old time by a couple of minutes. I wanted to work out yesterday, but I was way too sore from Saturday's run. So, another week without five days of workouts, but the ones I got in were good. I practiced speed during the week, endurance during the weekend. I like this system so far.

Move/make: Week 19

Weight (as of Tuesday afternoon): 172.0.

Workouts:
Monday: Ran 30 minutes, walked 30 minutes
Tuesday: Helped friends move (ran boxes up two flights of stairs for three hours)
Wednesday: Off
Thursday: Ran 55 minutes
Friday: Ran 30 minutes
Saturday: Ran 25 minutes
Sunday: Hiked four hours at a state park 

Thoughts on food:
Better than the last couple of weeks. I've been going out to eat less, and eating more fruit and smoothies. I still haven't cooked much, though I have baked a lot. I figured out the secret to cookies that stay chewy for days (something I've never been able to accomplish until now), so I'm feeling good. I found two simple, meat-free recipes I want to try. I've got a shopping list and I'm headed to the store shortly. I'm craving simple, home-cooked meals and lots of fresh fruit. This might be the first time this has happened in a while. 

Overall reflections:
I'm feeling much better than I was last time I wrote. I deep-cleaned the house, got caught up on laundry, and started tackling that to-do list. I still have a lot of things on my mind about jobs/money, but I'm slowly getting on top of everything else. Working out has helped a lot (as always). I'm on schedule to run a 10K for my birthday, too, so I'm feeling good. My weekends have slowed down some, too. I'm trying not to overbook myself, and it seems to be helping.

I know I have to listen to my moods, and go easy on myself when I'm feeling overwhelmed.  What helps most is just knowing I'm accomplishing a little bit each day. 

Goals:

• Grocery shop and make the two recipes I found (Greek salad with quinoa and huevos rancheros with avocado and black beans). 
• Stay on target for the 10K (that means running an hour this week).
• Keep making progress on that to-do list.

Move/make: Week 16

Weight (as of Monday morning): 171.8 pounds. 

Workouts:
Monday: Biked 20 miles
Tuesday: Ran 45 minutes
Wednesday: Ran 40 minutes
Thursday: Off
Friday: Hiked 30 minutes
Saturday: Off
Sunday: Ran 45 minutes 

Thoughts on food:
Still eating gradually healthier. I am trying to swap out Diet Coke for iced chai and Arnold Palmers. So far, I've made it one day without soda. Not that all the sugar in chai and iced tea/lemonade is healthy. It just seems better than the toxic chemicals in soda.

Otherwise, my eating has been pretty unbalanced. Not junk food, per se, but a lot of cheese, crackers, soy milk and strawberries. Not exactly healthy. I have no energy, and I'm training for a 10K at the end of August. Go figure. 

Overall reflections:
There are parts of my life that are very, very good right now. But I also have a huge mental block about two things in my life: eating/cooking, and finding a job for the fall. Those two things are really sapping my energy. And, of course, I need energy to overcome those speed bumps.

Running, as always, has been keeping me relatively calm and happy. We've had heat wave after heat wave, but I've been managing to keep going. 

Goals:
Given how I've been feeling, I owe it to myself to actually make good on some goals this week:

• Do something other than running. Go to the gym and swim or lift weights at least once. It will keep me from burning out before the 10K.
• Find two easy dishes to make for meals this week.
• Go grocery shopping and make those meals.
• Apply for jobs.

If I can do those four things, I'll be tremendously happy. And it will make my busy weekends feel better, because I won't have those things hanging over me. I owe it to my own mental health.

A bonus if I can finally get down below 170 pounds, but I'm not going to stress it. I need to start eating better, once and for all, first and foremost.

I'd like this week to be the last week I have to keep writing the same list of goals. I want to move forward!